The Big Talks

Back in March Justin started asking me about when he was a baby and he was really curious about whose tummy he was in. He said, "Mom I was in Elena's tummy". Oh goodness that came from out of nowhere. We were in the car on our way to a birthday party and I had the option of either ignoring his statement or telling him straightforward. No matter what books I had read or words from the professionals I memorized I was not prepared for that. So I just told him, his story, sparing details. And then he went about asking, What happens when our car crashes into another car?, What happens if I don't take a nap?, What happens if I forget to eat my sweet snack? and question after question.

Fast Forward to today:

Justin: Mom, I wished I was in your tummy
Me: Why?
Justin: Because I like you and I would be a baby like Brett, he was a funny baby.
Me:Oh...(and go on)
Justin: And I would already be here and you didn't have to go get me and you wouldn't have to wait for papers.
Me: I know Justin. But you are here now and that is all that matters right now. I am glad you are here and no more papers.

And then he happily goes into some other conversation about what happened at school much like our other serious conversations. I wonder what triggers his little mind to say these statements at the most random times. I wonder how much this will affect him later on in his life? Will he accept it or will he be angry? Will he know that I am on his side and I don't want him to hurt? Does he know I want answers too??

(Foster Mom's name changed)

Its REALLY official now!

On May 25, 2012 we made Justin's adoption final here in the U.S. Maddie and Brett were granted an excused absence and we were headed to the Ft. Worth, Texas Family Law Center. We stopped and ate breakfast at The Original Pancake House and then continued on.

It was really pretty easy and not stressful at all once we were in the court room. I don't have any babies, but if I did I hope I would be relaxed because all the cries and fusses in the court from the babies were not a big deal. In fact the judge asked for a little bit more noise because it was too quiet. They really did want a day of celebration in the court room and I guess all of the families were not rowdy enough for him. I was hoping to see more older child adoptions but Justin was clearly the oldest at almost 6 years old. A lot of babies except for one other brave family that had 3 biological boys and 2 younger adopted girls who seemed to be about 2 and 3 years of age.

I almost let Maddie and Brett go to school that day, but on the other hand I wanted another "official" day for them to process all of it, if it would help more. Questions still come up from the bio kids and I need to reassure them still. But on the other hand I think they "got it" and from all 3 the attitude was "Why are we going?" "But we are already a family", "But we already adopted him".

So needless to say as much as I would have wanted more of a celebration attitude it really was a lot like a day when the kids get along at times and then I'm breaking up a fussing match or two. But it is official and in the eyes of Texas we are the Sturm family of five.

This picture was taken before we went into the court room (everyone files in and listens to the other adoption cases. Each case lasted 3-4 minutes).

The judge pauses to take pictures with each family. Every child is welcome to take a stuffed animal home. They were used to decorate the court room.

Being a Big Brother

Having a little brother from Honduras is really hard. You have to get used to that boy or girl. You have to take care of them and put them to bed and feed them. When I first met Justin I was so excited to talk to him because he had really big eyes and he was really cute. We went to Wal-mart and went shopping for things we could use in Tegucigalpa. The roads were stumpy and there were a lot of mountains and hills. It was really cool there and we were staying in a little hotel. Every morning Justin would have Fruit Loops for breakfast. In the noon we always went on the rooftop. Sometimes we would play football and hide n seek. I bet Justin was really shy at first but he got used to us and he wasn't really scared anymore. Now 9 months later me and Justin play "the monkey and the zoo keeper". Justin is the monkey and I am the zoo keeper. The monkey always does funny things and always eats his homework, also known as Justin in the game. I think having a younger brother makes you really responsible for him. Sometimes Justin has a hard time falling asleep in his nap time. But when he wakes up me and Justin play "monkey and the zoo keeper" again. I'm really glad I have a brother in my family because it is really fun.
By Brett